I was knocked back by rejection after rejection, the little confidence that I had was destroyed. I felt totally helpless as I found it really hard to even make a call to or go into a job agency. Stuck in a total vicious cycle, I couldn’t get a job because the anxiety levels were so high and I couldn’t support myself because I couldn’t get a job.

I really saw NO WAY OUT. I thought that this was who I was and I could do absolutely nothing about it.

1: Premature Birth
I found out recentley premature birth can be a cause of anxiety for a child. It is a traumatic experience for the newborn and adrenaline levels often stay at higher than usual level. I was born 2 months premature and feel that this could be the starting point of things in my life.

2: Genetics
My biological parents are anxious people, especially my biological father. I have known him for 7 years now and from the first time I met him, I could tell from his manerisms that he was suffering with some form of social anxiety. I was told stories about my dad in his younger years, totally avoiding certain situations such as shopping, he would clam up if a shop assistant approached him. I can tell that my biological mum suffers with some form of anxiety due to the use of nicotine and alcohol to calm her nerves.

3: Upbringing
Looking back, I got everything I wanted as a child, I was very spoilt. I was adopted by my grandparents, who I call mum and dad. My mum is an anxious person, she worries alot and I feel strongly that I saw the world as a scary place growing up because of it. My dad is a self confident person but he is not a very sociable person, I didn’t really have conversations with my dad until a few years ago. There is no doubt in my mind that he loves me more than anything, he just found it hard to show it. Which i learned from him, I find it hard to open up.

4: Traumatic Events
At the age of 3 I was forced to play with other children at a disco on holiday with my parents. I was so scared, absolutely terrified, I ran back to my dad with tears in my eyes. From that moment I decided that people were scary, I would be cautious in talking to people because I didn’t want to feel that scared again.

So there you go, there is the rough guide to how my feelings of social anxiety manifested themselves in my life.

Just remember that anxiety is not you nor is it a part of your personality. Some of it may be conditioned or genetic, but you can unlearn it and become happy in your own skin. You can reach a confidence level that you want in your life.

Take care

Steve

I was in a hospital waiting room a few months back and I came accross this article featuring the Australian soap-star turned singer, Natalie Imbruglia. The article explained how she used therapy to overcome her issues with low self-esteem. Natalie, 34, shot to fame in her 20’s and says that she ‘feels uncomfortable’ with her title of ‘one of the world’s most beautiful women’.

Turning 30 also helped with her confidence and says that she is more comfortable in her skin.

Read the full article. Right-Click to Download: Natalie Imbuglia and Self Esteem

FEW children relish the start of a new school year. Most yearn for summer to continue and greet the onset of classes with groans or even dread. But among those who take the longest to adapt and thrive, psychiatrists say, are children trapped in a pathological condition. They are so acutely shy that they are said to suffer “social anxiety disorder” — an affliction of children and adolescents that, the clinicians argue, is spreading.

It may seem baffling, even bizarre, that ordinary shyness could assume the dimension of a mental disease. But if a youngster is reserved, the odds are high that a psychiatrist will diagnose social anxiety disorder and recommend treatment.

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17th November 2009
Steve Light is 27 years old, but growing up he felt robbed of a fulfilling life because he was gripped by social anxiety. Throughout his teens and early twenties he was locked in a cycle of acute shyness and low self-esteem. With social anxiety the main fear is of being negatively evaluated or judged – this can result in physical symptoms such as blushing, shaking or sweating.

After plucking up the courage to attend a local support group, Steve decided that he’d had enough. In 2005, he pledged not to let social anxiety ruin his life. Now 27, he’s set up Leading Light to help others who were affected by the condition. The programme offers help, support and guidance for social anxiety sufferers through various workshops, events and advice.

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Depression is a common mental illness which is estimated to affect up to one in five Britons at some point in their lifetime and to cost the UK about £8bn a year in medication, benefits and lost working days.

It can strike at any age and the feelings of hopelessness and helplessness attached to it can make it difficult for people to carry out their normal activities.

It can be more or less severe and symptoms are often varied, making it often hard to diagnose.

It is thought that some individuals may be more prone to depression, whether because of life experiences, their body chemistry or genetically inherited conditions.

Those who have suffered from depression include Sir Winston Churchill and Florence Nightingale.

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